Things can change at the drop of a buff.....

In one of my recents blogs I noted that just when you think you have this game figured out............. Matsing Day 10 Wow, each of the three tribes started with six players and since Matsing has lost the first four challenges they are down to Denise and Malcolm. The good thing about these two is they are positive people. These two are smiling and joking and basically come to the realization that their days are probably numbered. They spend the morning looking for the idol and after picking up the lid to the rice several times, Malcolm finally pulls the handle off the lid to find the idol. Even Denise cheers knowing full well it is Malcolm who has benefitted from this small triumph. They are both hoping that they will be added to the other tribes in lieu of having a two person challenge. Reward Challenge All three tribes arrive for a reward reward challenge, but first.................I remember back in the old Survivor days they had a reward challenge as well as an immunity. My favorite was when one tribe won toilet paper an outhouse. Two of the guys on the team actually slept in the wooden outhouse one night during a rain storm. It would have to have been raining pretty hard for me to spend a night in an outhouse. But I digress. Both tribes are given a servind tray which has an idol sitting on top, It is a simple game where by you simply attempt to knock the other person idol off of their tray. The first person's idol to hit the ground loses. Oh yes, beforehand we find out that Malcolm and Denise are to drop their buffs and pull a new one from a bag. Denise lands on Kalabaw and Malcolm goes to Tandang. After many quick and boring matches it is Malcolm who defeats Jeff. Actually he won by tossing his own high in the air and pushing Jeff's off of his tray which immediately hit the ground. Pretty smart. Tandang wins the Holiday Inn continental breakfast reward of coffee, tea and biscuits. "Did you find the hidden immunity idol? No but I stayed at a Holiday Inn last night." Back at Tandang You talk about a guy whose fate changed in the game very quickly, it would be Malcolm. Earlier in the day he was on a tribe that had two people left, it was raining, they had very little hope. Fast forward about ten minutes and he finds an idol, people welcome him to camp and then Peter tells Malcolm he wants to be his buddy and ....oh by way....Peter tells him he has an idol. As God as my witness I can't remember one player in the history of game of Survivor who had one foot on the plank and the other extended extended out over the ocean as he was about to get pushed into shark infested waters and then.......well then the captain of the ship says, "Dude, we were just kidding, get back on this ship you big duffus, give me a hug." Back at Kalabaw Denise shows up to camp and is welcomed with open arms also. The three girls in camp realize they now have a four to three advantage over the guys.................until. Katie points out that the women in camp now have a four to three advantage over the guys. Meantime, veteran player Jonathon approaches Denise and tells her that two of the girls Dawson and Katie are weak players and he invites her to join the guys alliance and she quickly says yes. So now Denise who was soon to follow Malcolm in walking the plank, has new life as well and a new alliance also. Then.............well then Dana who is linked with Katie and Dawson gets very sick and is soon on a boat going home, gave up, quit, whatever you call it. The doctors told her she was in no medical danger but I think she had just had enough of the rain. The challenge Run through an obstacle course, untie ropes to drop a drawbridge. gather puzzle pieces and put together the puzzle. Something to remember here, Abi from is asked to sit out yet another challenge for Tandang because they are one person up. The producers make a point to show this and by the look on Abi's face she is either volunteering to sit out againg or she isn't very happy about it. Tandang wins the challenge by a few seconds and it quite honestly came down to Katie not being able to transverse the first part of the obstacle course and held up the tribe as they only lost by a few seconds. Oh yes, Dawson wouldn't let Jonathon help her with the puzzle which didn't help either. Pre Council It is very evident that either Dawson or Katie is going home. One thing happens or better yet doesn't happen. Dawson knows that one of her tribemates is Jeff Kent who is a former major league baseball player and no one else knows this. When your head is on the chopping block, use anything, something, throw a rock, run with scissors, put your finger in an electric outlet, do something to save yourself. It doesn't mean people would have changed their mind but had she let everyone know that he was a former player, they might have changed their thinking about him because he has already made millions. Jeff is a smart player and is playing very well Dawson keeps her mouth shut and doesn't say a word and is sent home. Quick Review As it often times goes, it is the little things in this game that people take notice of and can change a game. Two players were walking the plank...... and then,...... they are told to drop their buffs, someone gets sick, someone does bad at a challenge and bingo bango, two people who were on a team that hadn't lost a challenge are now out of the game and suddenly two players who were on the ropes are now linked with the cool kids. You can never take for granted your place in this game because tomorrow something could happen that changes everything. Next Week. It appears to be a rough challenge and Artis gets pissed.

Repeating History

Those who do not study history are doomed to repeat it -Socrates This week we are going to add a section called, “Would I have done it that way?” Matsing Day 9 To take a quote from Star Wars, “The total destruction of the rebel alliance will soon be complete.” The total destruction of the Matsing tribe is almost complete and they don’t have Luke Skywalker nor Obi Won Kanobi on their side. Three challenges, three defeats and now down to three members left in their tribe vs. six in each of the other two. Once again the talk around camp centers around who to vote out. “Would I have have talked about who to vote out?” Not before I knew what the challenge was, what’s the point. All you are doing is promoting negative thoughts before a challenge. Meanwhile over at Tandang… This tribe appears to be very strong as they have a tarp, they have this, they have that, but cue the theatre music, they are about to lose their head. Abi openly tells RC she doesn’t want to talk to her anymore, evidently she re-evaluated her “Three minutes after we met, I look good in a bikini you look good in a bikini let’s be best buds for life alliance,” has worn off. That will happen when your best bud (RC) tells you that she has found a clue to the hidden immunity idol –AND- reads you the clue aloud. Then best bud B (Abi) goes out and finds the idol right under RC’s nose. Peter jumps on the boat and wants to cause chaos and reassures Abi that he doesn’t trust RC either. “Would I have taken the clue knowledge supplied to me and found the idol?” I would have done half of what Abi did. She found the idol (Which I would have done or at least looked for it) but she also previously told Peter she was given the clue and then she tells him she found the idol. WTF? She now risks that her first friend RC sticks around past the merge so she will find out that Abi has the idol and Peter now has the ability to blindside Abi. Two bad things could be bring the end to Abi. Take control of what you can control in the game and quit giving up decided advantages. She is already buds with Peter, what did she gain from spilling the beans? Kalabaw Jonathon who has found the hidden immunity at their camp now wants to buddy up with both Jeff and Carter. While the three guys are out collecting food in the water they talk. Earlier in the game we heard Jeff say that he wanted Jonathon gone, he did this if front of the entire tribe. By telling the tribe he wants Jonathon gone and now thinking about keeping him might put him on the chopping block later because of a trust issue. Now he sounds like his running for president as he says, “I need to re-evaluate my thoughts and might want to partner up with Jonathon.” “Would I have told the others I had found the idol if I was Jonathon?” In this case maybe, he knows he is a returning player and people might want him gone because of that. I need to write a Cardinal Rule subsection for returning players. The way he approached Jeff was beneficial and he also spoke loud enough for Carter to hear who was standing close by. Experience is kicking in with Jonathon as he wanted Carter to hear the conversation. The three guys are gone from camp for about two hours and the three girls in the tribe are very aware that the guys are probably forming an alliance because they have been gone so long. Ya think? I am guessing the guys are thinking the same about the girls at this point. Quick Review The two tribes who have won all the challenges and haven’t had to vote anyone out are dividing at the seams. Yes folks this game is as much psychological as physical. That and the fact you never know when Jeff Probst might show up and say, drop your buffs, we are realigning the teams. You have to expect anything is this game. The Immunity Challenge The teams will take turns carrying two heavy clay pots via a long log which you carry over your shoulders. They must transverse through an obstacle course and then set the pots on top of posts of varying heights. If a survivor drops or breaks a pot along the route they simply have to return and start over. The goal is to set six rice filled pots and then use a ball on a rope to swing and break the pots. Something not to be overlooked here is the tribes who haven’t lost a challenge must sit out three players and each team decides to have all the girls sit out. This does not go un-noticed by the girls on both tribes. Unfortunately Matsing has the lead early for the first time in any challenge, but loses yet again. Russell goes off on a rant once again. Pre-Tribal Council Malcolm, Denise and Russell takes turns talking to one another knowing full well one of them is going home. As I watch this go on at camp the only thing I know for sure is, I don’t know who is going home. I would have thought at this point Russell, who has a clue to the hidden idol in their camp, would have spent his entire time looking for the idol which he doesn’t. ”Would I have looked for the idol at this point?” Ah, hell yes. I wouldn’t care if the other two knew it, I have a one in three chance of going home and if I find the idol I am staying so I would have taken advantage of my last opportunity to stay. Tribal Council Again, I had not clue as to who was going home, but Russell is voted out. It basically came down to either Denise or Russel with no one talking about voting out Malcolm. Let's rewind to last week, the same Malcolm who was chastised for snuggling with Angie who was voted out last week. Short memories and this shows how fast your head can go on and off of the chopping block. Knowledge is King Getting back to the title of this blog. People continue to make the same mistakes as players from the past. The Hidden Immunity Idol is just that, hidden, people don’t know you have it, that is the biggest individual advantage you can have in this game. While Denise and Malcolm did look through Russell’s “stuff” to see if he had the idol from their camp before they voted, that’s called games-man-ship. At least Jonathon had a plan when he told Jeff he had the idol over at Kalabaw. Meanwhile at Tandang, Abi seems just to be happy that her former best bud RC doesn’t have the idol. I am guessing Jonathon uses the idol to his advantage while Abi, well Abi gets blindsided because of her over confidence in herself, she won’t think anyone is voting for her. Three things hold true in Survivor. One, If you play the idol at tribal council you can’t get voted out that night. Two, find a way to use the hidden immunity idol to your advantage. Three and probably most importantly, build trust within your group, not just a couple of people. For some reason RC doesn’t have the trust of her tribe mates and will probably be the first of her tribe to go because of it. She was readily available to tell everyone she doesn't trust Lisa early on, but has no clue how to defend that when her name comes up as untrustworthy. For someone who says she is a super fan and knows how to play, she doesn’t look the part. As with past players who were cocky in the beginning, she doesn't have a plan B.

Cuddling vs. Can't Do

There are some things you should always do on Survivor like pitch in and help, make friends and generally be yourself. There are things you should never, ever do like tell your tribe, “I can’t do that challenge.” Nor do you have someone tell you about a hidden immunity idol clue and then go behind their back and find it yourself. Breaking a trust is huge in this game. Quick review We see that Jonathon Penner has found an idol which was actually the handle to the rice box, very clever by the way. Lisa is still crying. RC tells her best bud Abi about the clue she found on where to find the idol. To quote Homer Simpson, “DOH.” Let’s all recite the Hidden Immunity Idol crede, “Never tell anyone you have the idol –OR- more importantly never tell anyone what the clue says, unless of course you have already found the idol.” Matsing Day 6 This tribe has already lost two challenges and instead of talking about how to improve they are talking about who to vote out next. Why don’t your try to win a challenge instead of talking about losing. Someone forgot to tie the raft down so they have lost their raft when the tide came in. To quote Homer Simpson a second time, “DOH II.” Tandang This is going to sound like a soap opera but……RC tells Abi that she has found a clue to the idol and even tells her what the clue says. Abi immediately runs to Peter and tells him she doesn’t trust RC but at the same time breaks that trust by telling Peter that RC has told her the words in the clue to find the idol. Abi then goes out and find the idol. Of course her comment was, “I found the idol, I knew where it was the whole time.” No you didn’t because the idol was sitting in your camp for nine days girl, right in front of your face. Sound like a reality show doesn’t it? Immunity Challenge Dive into the water and swim out to rope which is anchored to the bottom of the lake. There are puzzle pieces attached and each progressive piece is tied deeper into the water. It appears the last piece is about twelve to fifteen feet underwater. Once again Matsing finishes last meaning they must vote someone out. Angie, who is all of 20 years old couldn’t even go two feet under water to untie the first puzzle piece. 2 feet underwater people, yes two feet underwater which is about one inch deeper than your bathtub. Girl must have really rough time if she drops her soap during her Saturday night bath. Halfway through the challenge Angie says, “I can’t do this.” NO, NO, NO, never admit you can’t do a challenge while a challenge is going on. Of course not to be outdone, Russell can’t even climb up the two foot ladder out of the water. Maybe he should have had one of those monitors around his neck, “Help I’ve fallen and can’t climb a two foot ladder.” Let’s review, one person can’t go down two feet and the other can’t go up two feet. By the way RC was hands down the best swimmer of everyone in this challenge. Hopefully people took notice as there will be more water challenges to come. She could be a huge threat in upcoming individual challenges. Tandang The only thing I have to say about Tandang is this, Artis complained that Mike broke the goggles during the challenge. Artis can indeed speak after nine days of not speaking. My thoughts were Survivor had recruited a monk to play this game. Matsing They are going to tribal council and it is quite apparent that Russell and Angie are on the chopping block. At this point it comes down to who is the weakest link, two people who can’t do much in challenges really. My vote at this point would be to keep Russell simply because he will be loyal but will be the easier vote off later on because his mouth will get him into trouble. Angie cuddled with Malcom early on and he realizes that, “There is no cuddling at night on Survivor.” There is no crying nor cuddling allowed on Survivor. Tribal Council Denise says she has given up a lot leaving family and clients behind……….cue the violins please. Everyone who has ever played this game has left something or somebody behind. Although I think Denise is by far one of the smartest players in this game. Malcolm says Angie and Russell both struggled and the time to step up and play harder is now, “This ain’t sixth grade dodge ball.” Angie is voted off. Next Week Mike Skupin sustains his 57th injury of the year and Matsing must win a challenge or at the very least finish second so they don’t have to vote someone out.

Cookies and Booby Traps

Ah yes, week two and paranoia is already setting in, that usually doesn't happen until week four or five so this crew is way ahead of the norm. Matsing Night 3 (Paranoia Part 1) Russell tells us he was on the chopping block last week and needs to back off on the leadership role. Bueaty queen Angie and Bartender Malcolm are both cold during the night and cuddle with each other. (By the way Angie helped me write this post and spell checked her work on her car's GPS unit............yeah. Do I need to say more?) Back to Malcolm and Angie. A hunky bartender and a beauty pagent queen hooking up, what are the odds on that? Meanwhile, God's number 1 Survivor disciple Roxy notices this sinful behavior. "We have to get rid of one of them." Cue the side music, "Dun, Dun, Dun." Tandang Day 4 (Paranoia Part 2) Banker RC finds a clue to the hidden immunity idol in the rice. RC shares this information with her best bud Latina born Abi and they dance and hug and do the things that Malcolm and Angie were doing, but I guess since it's two hot girls in bikinis on a beach hugging and touching, THATS ACCEPTABLE. Who am I to judge. RC then is seen talking to Mike and afterward best bud Abi confronts RC about this conversation and tells her, "You were talking to Mike a long time and don't *&^% with me." See, I just proved my point, Mike wasn't wearing a bikini so he isn't allowed to talk with someone wearing a bikini, I am so smart. Kalabaw Day 4 It rains and rains so the tribe moves to a cave in an effort to keep dry. Oh wait a minute, Jonathon Penner stays behind at camp. This tribe may be the strongest but here's the thing, and here comes my, "Have they ever watched a single episode of Survivor....." they are leaving a three time player behind at camp by himself after they have said, "We think he is looking for the idol." So why would you allow this guy to be by himself which would what? Allow him to look for the idol. Of course he finds the idol which, by the way wasn't in a tree. I will give the producers credit for where it was hidden this time, right out in the open where anyone could have found it. Here's the problem that Jonathon has now, he has bonded with no one. Granted he found the idol but that saves him for one day. Matsing Day 5 Roxy tells Russell and Denise about the whole Malcolm and Angie thing. Here's my two cents about doing this. It is a good thing to provide this information about others but....and this is a big but....you need to be very good at the game playing side including challenges if you do this............Unfortunately for Roxy Denise takes notice of here antics. Denise is a very smart player (to remind she is the sex therapist, I will remind you of that often) she is a very smart player and has aligned herself with both Russell and Malcolm. I know it is early in this game bit a tribe who is down early in this game and loses challenges often times form a strong bond when weaker players aren't there to drag them down. Tandang Day 5 Lisa is having a hard time because as she says, "I am an introvert." A message here from the Survivor Emergency Broadcast System, "Attention future players, if you want to do well in this game, don't be introverted." Thank you. Then we get special bonus coverage for a "Survivor Breakdown," moment, complete with subtitles. Honest to God, Survivor now think, we the fans, don't know when someone is breaking down. Yes, we have reached Nirvana. I am talking about the Nirvana of inner peace and not the rock band headed by Kurt Cobain who died of a cocain overdose. I had to clear that up. Anyhow, the tribe thinks Lisa can't be trusted as whe always goes out by herself. I actually feel sorry for her to a point but then again I go back to my most repeated quote, "Have you never watched a single episode of Survivor." What part of the game did you think was going to be easy? Matsing Day 6 Roxy's turn to breakdown because of all the rain. Then the sun comes out and Roxy is seen lying on the beach praying. I will say this about this game, when they say no privacy, they are right. Denise makes the most obvious comment, "People need to dig deep to play this game." Challenge Each team will have two players drag a sled over the sand to pick up heavy puzzle pieces and return to the puzzle table to put together three puzzles. Roxy tells her team that she "Hasn't been drinking much water so she is weak." Really? Play the game and shut up. One of my cardinal rules, "Never show weakness and never tell others you can't do something." Go out and suck at a challenge but when you tell people you suck, you just re-inforced what they already knew. Tandang wins and gets a tarp, blankets and pillows. Kalabaw is second and gets a tarp which of course means Matsing is sending someone homem Matsing Pre-Council Talk centers around either Angie or Roxy. Angie and Malcolm are too close per what Roxy continues to say. Malcolm points out in a confessional that he is probably getting to close to Angie, but she is attractive. He also points out that Roxy does nothing around camp. Cue the music again, "Dun, dun, dun." Tribal Council Russell is emotional because he doesn't like losing. Denise says they are in a stage of accusing each other, but that happens when you lose. Roxy, oh dear Roxy, when Jeff asks her the question, "If you could change anything around camp, what would it be." Her answer is, "We have too much energy at camp and people are always getting wood or water. We need to rest more." Coming fron someone who doesn't work very hard, yeah, not the right thing to say. However, when Jeff asks Angie the same question her reply is, "We need cookies." As God as my witness I sat up in my chair and one second before Jeff said, "Really?", I said the same thing. At that point the looks on everyone faces was the same, "Really." I do attribute this to her age, but "Cookies." Roxy then calls out Malcolm and Angie for their relationship and says, "She is setting up a booby trap." Nice one. Roxy apologizies for the reference but she knew what she was saying. Roxy then tells the group, "Good luck if you pick her over me." Surprise, surprise, boobs win out over God and Roxy is sent packing. In hind sight I think they voted the right person out because quite simply Roxy sucked at challenges, didn't do much at camp and was a negative person. Angie ain't smart but having someone on your team who isn't smart in this game means a vote in your favor and of course she's not very smart which increases your odds of winning. Also, you don't want two people in your alliance who hate each other. Next Week Lise is cautiously optimistic and Skupin might be on the chopping block.

Sum-Bitch

The start of a new Survivor season brings a smile to my face and tones of “I told you so,” to my voice. 3 of the 18 players on this season’s version of Survivor are returning players who sustained injuries in previous season. Within the first two days of this season, 2 of these 3 players have not developed a good relationship with their tribes which is never a good sign. Then we have a former major league baseball player with 17 years of baseball experience, injures his knee three minutes into the game, yes I said three minutes into the game. Finally we have a former children’s television star who has seen every episode, is a big fan, but is seen crying in next week’s preview wondering aloud if she has was it takes to continue. Yes folks, its Survivor season once again. Boat Entrance Jeff is seen entering this season driving his mom and dad’s new speed boat, hopefully he asked them if he could borrow it. He docks up next to a larger boat which has 15 new contestants who are not allowed to talk to one another until Jeff says so. Two of the contestants provide their thoughts, “Hope there are no past players nor any celebrities playing.” For those of you playing along at home, that is called foreshadowing, research it, study it and be ready to recite it. Next we see another boat show up with three former players who were injured in previous seasons. Jeff then says the three teams have 60 seconds to unload everything they can from the boat and load them onto their prospective rafts for immediate launch. Sort of like the divorce decree, thanks for playing, hugs and kisses now get your shit and get out. Matsing Tribe Returning player Russell tells everyone in his tribe that he doesn’t want to be the leader of the tribe and then starts telling everyone what to do. Angie tells us she is a former Miss teen Utah and that Russell is bossy. Malcolm lived in Micronesia for a year (This ain’t your mom’s Micronesia dude) and Zane has a tattoo of Frankenstein on his arm. WTF? He dropped out of school at 17 because “you don’t make money going to school.” What great logic, why did I go to school at all. He retreads tires now. (Oh yeah, that’s why) Denise is a sex therapist. I am wondering, if I get hurt having sex is she who I go to, to get healed? I wonder what the rehab would be like? You thought the same thing. Zane tells everyone he has an alliance with everyone. DUH? Why? Kalabaw Tribe Returning player Jonathon Penner shakes hands, kisses babies and then starts looking for the hidden immunity idol which isn’t a bad thing unless of course, everyone knows you are looking for the idol which of course happens. Dana picks up on this and wants him gone now. Sarah says she knows who Jeff Kent is on team and that he played major league baseball….uh oh….somebody knows him. Tandong Tribe Returning player Michael Skupin makes friends immediately. KC who is a banker says she is ready for anything because she can hail a taxi in her high heels. I can chew gum, walk and talk at the same time but you don’t me bragging about that. Michael then does something smart, on the sly he goes up to former childhood tv star Lise Welchel and tells her he knows who she is. Doesn’t make a big deal of it but points its out. Abi starts playing the flirting girl when she asks hunk Pete to cut a piece of wood for her. RC points out that Lisa can’t be trusted. I will point out here that you should read RC’s profile on Survivor Fever, thinks an awful lot of herself. Matsing Tribe Russel finds a clue in the rice for the hidden immunity idol. Zane sees Russell reading something and tells everyone in the tribe. Everyone now thinks Russell has an idol. Immunity Step one is to have two tribe mates run up a cargo net and release the paddles for a boat. The next two will row out and untie a large box containing puzzle pieces and bring it back to shore. The third two-some will put the puzzle together. Russell again pisses off his tribe mates when he assigns Roxanne and Angie to do the puzzle even though they both say they are lousy at puzzles. Guess what, their tribe loses, imagine that. Dumbest Idea Part Two Thinking back to last season when the men’s tribe gave um immunity after winning the challenge, I thought that was dumb. This move from Zane was even dumber. Dude goes back to camp and tells everyone to vote for him because he lost the challenge and he is a hinderance. He then goes off camera and says this could be the best idea ever, “telling everyone to vote for me so everyone won’t vote for me.” I am going to re-type that part slowly so you can re-read it slowly. Zane tells people to vote him off the island because he doesn’t want them to vote for him. Getting back to his Frankenstein Tatoo for a moment do you realize if you add the letter “I” to Frankenstein you get Frank Einstein, to steal a phrase from that one beer commercial, “Brilliant.” Anyhow he gets voted out which for a dumbass should be expected. Oh his way out you hear him mumble “Sum-Bitch.” The tribe voted correctly in keeping Russell who is strong, vs Zane, who, I am not sure how to describe that guy other than wild card. Next Week Our television star cries and a storm hits.

Force Justifying Your Life

I am sure at least one of my loyal readers has heard the term "Force Justifying," at some time or another at the workplace. If you don't know what Force Justifying means, below are two paragraphs, the first without force justifying and the second with. Peter owned a white rabbit which bit his pet dog on the ear everyday. One day the dog said, "Screw this" and picked up the rabbit and threw it under a passing bus which killed the rabbit instantly. Peter owned a white rabbit which bit his pet dog everyday. One day the dog said, "Screw this" and picked up the rabbit and threw it under a passing bus which killed the rabbit instantly. As you can see the second paragraph is uniforn on both the right and left hand sides of the paragraph, this was done by adding a few extras spaces to make the paragraph have a more eye pleasing look. I came upon this when I was asked to proof read several postcards, flyers and other assorted items and noticed those "extra" spaces between some words which appeared on these publications. With that in mind I was thinking I need to make my life more "Force Justified." For example, I am not at all sure that I have any friends who are Jewish. So to fill in the blanks I am asking my fans to step forward and introduce me to any Jewish people they know, to fill in the space so to speak. I have the full compliment of Catholics, Gays, Football Fans, Beer Drinkers, Gamblers and that one cousin that, let's say, people would rather not sit next to at a family reunion. (You've got a cousin like that in your family, you just don't write about it on a public blog.) As far as cooking, someone has to show me how to make a good meatloaf. I think I want to take a yoga class but I have heard between the heat and humity in the room you sometimes come out smelling like a wet dog. (Any thoughts?)Unless my sisters get busy I will have to cross have any nieces off of the list. Maybe I can rent one for a day just to see if that would be cool or not. Finally, I think I may want to visit Brigham Young University on graduation day, the place where they make students sign a NO SEX clause while they are in school. I want to be there to shake the hands of both virgins and people who never got caught.

My past two weeks.

Since Survivor is on hiatus until the fall, I thought I would update you on my last two weeks and what I have learned. By the way, I wrote CBS a letter and asked them if the people who hide the hidden immunity could possibly in their heart attempt to find a different place to hide the idol besides inside a tree or a hollowed out log which I think is where it has been hidden the last 47 times just sayin'. Printing For the past three years our company has printed four monthly neighborhood magazines which are distributed in the Dublin, Ohio area. Each and every month I put in a request for 100 additional magazines to be printed for samples which are printed in our Des Moines, Iowa office and then sent to me. Last week I received 742 sample copies because, as I was told, "We hired a new girl and this is her first time doing this print run." What did I learn? Never hire new people who can't read emails or count. Cupcakes and Mom My mom sent my sister Julie and I to the store to buy cupcake inserts so she could make cupcakes for my nephew Nick's high school graduation party. The inserts needed to be white because the cupcakes would be the school colors of orange and black and if we bought the multi colored inserts, then the blues, reds and greens would contrast the orange and black of the cupcakes. I asked my mom if she thought the people coming to party wouldn't eat the cupcakes if they were in the multi-color, mismatched inserts. She never answered me. What did I learn? Don't question my mom on such high stress issues like cupcakes. My Nephew My youngest nephew Aidan is eight years old and is the smartest kid under the age of nine that I know. Of course I only know a handful of kids under the age of nine..........Dude is a walking encyclopedia of knowledge and is athletic. Anyhow, I asked him to come along with me if I make it onto Survivor and promised him I would buy him a pool if I won. What did Aidan learn? He never agreed on the size of the pool. Next week We will discuss that little bastard who cut me off in traffic and why I won't wear green shoes again.